Tuesday, 28 December 2010

put the kettle on, sweet decisions need to be made

It would have been more conventional to begin this small written account of the goings on in my life in the New Year, when the crisp morning brakes into my drunken consciousness and i jump out of my unmade bed full of carp diem and inspiring phrases from the calendar mum bought me for christmas. However, at this precise moment, sat cross-legged on the sofa listening to the boyfriend's parents calling today 'the first day of the rest of your life' and the way they pronounce each word so that the beginning and the end punch the air, makes me feel ever so slightly dizzy and clammy, but in a good way. like when you drink a hot coffee in a hot room; the coffee is delicious and ordinarily the room temperature would be perfect but combined together it makes small beads of perspiration on the back of your neck that slide slowly down your back. but it doesn't mean that you are going to stop drinking the coffee.
so im a good kind of scared. and slightly freaked that New Years has appeared to have come early. right now, right now i can hear it outside, the door bell's ringing and i'm staring at the door itching to call out and now i'm biting my nails that i'd promised i'd grow because it's now stopped ringing and started knocking and i should sit on my hands but i cant because i'm typing but then would it be so bad, so terrible to let New Year's in and start the rest of my life today instead of Saturday?
the only problem is i'm not entirely sure what the 'rest of my life' should consist of. i want to paint, but i have no space for canvases and brushes, so now this shall be my canvas, the keypad can be my brushes and the letters that spell the words will be my brush strokes.
oh and hello, i'm millie and i'm very pleased to meet you. please make yourself at home and have a cup of tea.

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